A willing victim, part 2

I do not know what I expected from the letter I found last night. Did I really expect a love letter? Flowery words of undying devotion and worship? No.. maybe. When I first began to read it I barely got past the first paragraph before I threw it on the ground and stormed to the deck. I meant to leave, I meant to scream. But Sorp chashed me there, forcing the letter back into my hands.

"Finish it!" She insisted. And I did. I read the letter all the way though and then read it again.

"I have missed you Xianthe and have planned for your return to me all along. The Plenitude, a sleek and beautiful thing to me, has occupied me at times when I missed you and I hope that you see that in her making. I will rendezvous with you when you make the mainland and look forward to hearing of your time at court. Sincerely, the one who thinks of you as his, Agrippa."

It was the above line that I would recall the most. It was burned, brightly, into my mind. There was so many memories between Agrippa and I. There were several pivitol moments.. His hand on my belly at the beach. The night he forced me to sign the Contract and this letter. That last paragraph.

Later, while I lay on that small cozy couch, I ran my hands over the carvings, my fingers pressed into the small grooves and my eyes closed. I wanted to think of him that way, sweating, intense, concentrated on creating something.. just for me.

I wished I had thrown my arms around him at the estate when I saw him. I wished a hundred times that I had been kinder to him when he came to the Ubars dinner. That I had told him I loved him when he took me over the table.. in the palace. I wished I had loved him.. better.

But don't worry, I'll get over that!